Recovery Report Cards

[monkofstick]

Recovery is a bit like school.

There is more to staying clean than mere abstinence, as any
recovering addict can tell you. We have to take an active role in our
recovery in order to succeed in the long run.

Not only that, but recovery is a learning experience. Period. When we
first get clean, we have no idea about how to live life clean. We
don't know how to play by the rules anymore. So recovery is all about
learning. We learn how to get through tricky situations without
relapsing. We learn how to have fun again without using. We learn how
to reach out and connect with others in recovery in order to stay
strong. And so on. It's all one big learning experience.

So how do we know what kind of progress we're making in our recovery?
Let's just check out our recovery report card.

You'll notice that "Math" and "History" are not on this report card
The subjects in the school of recovery are a bit different, of
course.

And what is most interesting about the school of recovery is that
most people get a bit mixed up. They think, for example, that one of
the subjects might be "serenity," or even "maintaining abstinence."
These are outcomes of a successful learning experience, but they are
not the lesson itself.

So what are the lessons? The answer to this would vary depending on
what program you are following. I would argue that any decent program
will have the following three "subjects" at a bare minimum:

1) Caring for yourself - This has to become a priority. Low self
esteem plagues struggling addicts and it becomes
necessary to repair it in order to maintain recovery. Without doing
so, the temptation to relapse will be too great.

If you were in recovery school, the category of "caring for self"
would be more than just one subject or one class..it would be an
entire curriculum; something you could major in at college. We need
to start caring for ourselves on a whole number of different levels.
This is the holistic approach to recovery and well being.

It's pretty easy to tell if you are struggling in this area, because
your progress here will be a reflection of how you feel about
yourself. When I first got clean , I needed to do some work
in this area. It took time to rebuild my self-worth. It took time for
me to start treating myself with respect (for example, by quitting
smoking).

2) Networking with others - Especially important in early recovery,
in order to build support systems that will get you through the tough
times. Perhaps you've fallen out of touch with others in recovery
lately, and your grades have slipped a bit in this class? In that
case, find a way to reach out and reconnect.

3) Push for person growth - Again, the subject of personal growth
could not possibly be covered with just a single class in school. It
would more likely be an entire series of courses, spanning topics
such as:

* Knowing your triggers and slippery situations
* Overcoming self-pity and resentment
* Learning to forgive and let go of anger
* Fitness and nutrition
* Quitting smoking
* Emotional balance
* Social skills and support

I would equate personal growth with doing your homework. If you don't
get active with this subject and really push yourself, it's unlikely
that you will make any significant progress. I also think that
personal growth mirrors the homework concept because it might seem to
be irrelevant to your recovery (just like kids might think some
homework is pointless), but pursuing personal growth indirectly helps
you to stay clean in the long run.

What does your report card look like?
So now that you've seen the general subjects, what does your report
card look like? Do you need to spend more time studying, or have you
aced your recovery?

How does the principle of self-honesty help you in accepting yourself?