I made it throught day 1 with no meth. May not sound like much but it is a lot to me. That drug has such a hideous pull on my life. I know though that through my higher power I have all the strength I need to make it through today without using. My roommate still uses and I am not in a position to move right now but I am willing to go to whatever lengths is necessary to stay clean today. I watch the destruction in his life….
I have so many 1st days of trying to clean. I want this to be my last first day. I was clean and sober for many years and then had a huge fall. Callng it a slip would be like calling Katrina a rainstorm.
I have been trying to get clean again for 8 years. Meth is my drug of choice these days and it does some insidious things to your thoughts and priorities. I just wanted to say that there is relief to be reminded that I am not the only one.
The words that we have heard a lot of since last year, and the words that are being used by many people this year as we have moved forward not only in history, but in a new age of life. However I am just wondering if our Government that we have right now, is maybe acting like the citizens or some of them with more debt for us? Oh boy YES WE CAN!
I have always wondered why they choose certain people for the new plans to fit but what about the people that are always needy? I mean what about those that really need help, as most of the people that have addiction or alcoholism in there life, and the POWER that it has, what about finding more help or maybe should I go as far to say as NEW HELP for them!
What about all of those people who’s lives are forever changed with People like US? Who are we>? Well if you, need to even ask that question, we are people that have or are using drugs! Some of us are clean and some of us are not clean. Some of us probably can quit using if we are, but I know from my own experience that there are some of us who can not NOT USE! What does that mean? We can not quit once we have started, and once we have started we loose all POWER within ourselves to even be able to moderate any consumption at all!
Or what about those on a very fixed limited income? Those people that have nothing? Those people that have lost all and can not even afford a roof over there head. I personally feel that we are just missing the whole picture.
I think that we are going to be very sorry in years to come with such a debt that we are not ever going to get out of where we live today. The world isn’t getting smaller it is only getting bigger and so are the problems that we have to endour
The delusions that we are like other people?
I am not to sure if we are really all that much different than most people. I think more than not we try to find excuses saying that we are different, and in fact I have come to believe that we are probably all about the same even compared to what some call the *Normal* People.
I have been in a state of mind where I would love to just say, yeah I am different than you because I suffer from drinking and using dope too much! LOL well someone else might be able to say, I am different because I eat too much damn chocolate candy and now that it is the holidays I am totally screwed. Well these to me anymore are just excuses and IMO we are no different than anyone else.
Although a lot of us tend to disagree with this fact, and many of the people in the Program tend to think that they are so unique from other people because they claim that they have a disease that is incurable, which might be true and it might not be but it is a delusion for them to think that they are special than other people. I have heard that they say they are the elect LMMFAO well I don’t know what makes them think that they are the chosen ones. I tend to feel that they might be putting the cart before the horse on this one.
Than we can also suffer from the delusions that we are less than others. I suffer from this area myself quite a bit from time to time. Not saying that one of the delusions is more than the other but the one of the feeling of less than is harder to deal with or that is my own experience.
So as I come here with this topic of Delusions
Do we seek life through the eyes of a clear mind?
Studying is a very simple concept right!?! Yes it is, but it also takes some dedication and a heck of a lot of keeping focused and keeping on track. It is so important that we study, in order to get the results that we want. And if we don’t want better results than we don’t study. In order to get good grades in class, we must apply ourselves, focus on what we are doing, and make sure that we are directly connected to what we are doing.
It is so simple, yet sometimes we will become complacent and that isn’t good for us. We need to do the very best that we can in whatever we are doing. One thing that I have noticed here lately is that it takes a lot more than just to show up for a class. It takes involvement in that class also. We must participate in what we are doing in order for whatever we are studying to become very effective. Now this concept isn’t knew to us, yet it is like a God Shot to someone such as myself.
I have been in recovery for quite sometime now. However even with the time that I have in, I have not participated too much in my recovery, nor have I even studied that much in order to get the results that I would like to have. I suppose a guy would even say that I have pretty much just rested on my morals, if in fact I even had any to begin with. So I come up with the conclusion that we need to get back to the basics. And what are the basics of studying.
First thing is to show up on time. We can not be late for class because there are consequences for being late, or tardy if you remember. And if you get too many of them than you can get suspended and than if that happens you are going to be missing out on a lot of things from the class that you will probably end up failing. So showing up on time is very important.
Now in class we have to also pay attention to the teacher. That being said, if you are in Recovery, the teacher can be a lot of different things. I know many will automatically go into the Sponsor, God stuff, etc. but there are other teachers such as just friends, maybe your partner, books, literature, Forums sites that have a whole lot of Resources and things of the such. These things are all teachers and if we are paying attention to it than we are off to a wonderful start.
Now usually during class, when the teacher is teaching, most of us have used what we know as taking notes. Now as far as the notes are concerned, that is pretty much the same as journalism. Now if you go to most websites that are used for recovery they or most of them have journal forums in them so you are able post and most of the Internet world are not able to see them unless they are members of that Forum so that is a good way to express yourself and to be able to take note so to speak.
Than when all is said and done, once we have commensed this way of life, we than are ready to take the test. The test in recovery and being able to pass the test is to learn how to live life without the use of using. To put into action the things that we are taught by all the process above and to score on that test so to speak. The score depends on how well we follow the directions and how well we have listened throughout sessions. That my friends is Studying to this addict.
Thanks for allowing me to share.
Service work comes in many shapes and forms. You don’t have to wait for a week of sobriety to get involved into doing service work. You are being of service just by showing up at the meeting. That is my opinion.
I know that for myself and countless others, service work is one of the keys to sobriety, and to keeping your sobriety. IMO when a person stops doing those things that keeps him sober that is when his sobriety will go also. That has been my experience.
So we should also remember to be of service, to stay in service, in order to keep what has been given to us freely.
Addiction The Disease Concept
The Disease model of addiction is probably the most controversial and debated topic in the entire field of substance abuse/addiction. One would have to be well informed on the subject to even attempt to understand the controversy intelligently. This site will not claim to know for sure one way or the other (disease/not disease) but will present a little of both sides of the on going debate with in the professional circles. First, we must accurately define Disease, since when the word disease is mentioned most think of something like cancer, aids, heart, etc., something which can be isolated in part and extracted from the body and visibly viewed and observed by the eye under a microscope or other apparatus. This is not the case with the “disease of alcoholism/addiction” or at least not at this time. According to Webster’s Dictionary disease is defined as follows:
“Disease: Any departure from health presenting marked symptoms; malady; illness; disorder.” Then we must go on to define concept as well, which according to Webster’s is: “Concept: A notion, thought, or idea.”
This popular model of addiction is credited to E.M. Jellinek who presented a comprehensive disease model of alcoholism in 1960(13). The World Health Organization acknowledged alcoholism as a serious medical problem in 1951, and the American Medical Association declared alcoholism as a treatable illness in 1956. Following Jellinek’s work, the American Psychiatric Association began to use the term disease to describe alcoholism in 1965, and the American Medical Association followed in 1966 (14). As with many concepts and theoretical models in the addiction field, the disease concept was originally applied to alcoholism and has been generalized to addiction to other drugs as well. The “disease of addiction” is viewed as a primary disease. That is, it exists in and of itself and is not secondary to some other condition. This is in contrast to the psychological model of Dual Diagnosis (discussed in the next section), which addictive behavior is seen as secondary to some psychological condition.
Arguments Against the Validity of the Disease Concept
As earlier stated, the disease concept is controversial and not without critics. Two well-known critics are Stanton Peele (16) and Herbert Fingarette (15), both of whom have written books, as well as articles disputing the disease concept of addiction.
Since the disease concept is attributed to Jellinek, a lot of criticism has been directed at his research, which was the basis for his conclusions about the disease concept. Jellinek’s data were gathered from questionnaires that were distributed to AA members through its newsletter, “The Grapevine”. Of 158 questionnaires returned, 60 were discarded because members had pooled and averaged their responses, and no questionnaires from women were used. Jellinek himself acknowledged that his data was limited. Therefore, one might wonder why Jellinek’s concept of the disease of alcoholism received such widespread acceptance.
One reason is that the disease concept is consistent with the philosophy of AA, which is by far the largest organized group dedicated to help for alcoholics.
Secondly, as Peele noted: “The disease model has been so profitable and politically successful that it has spread to include problems of eating, child abuse, gambling, shopping, premenstrual tension, compulsive love affairs, and almost every other form of self-destructive behavior… From this perspective, nearly every American can be said to have a disease of addiction.” (16)
Herbert Fingarette goes on to state that the alcohol industry itself contributes to forming a public perception of alcoholism as a disease, as a marketing ploy:
“By acknowledging that a small minority of the drinking population is susceptible to the disease of alcoholism, the industry can implicitly assure consumers that the vast majority of people who drink are not at risk. This compromise is far preferable to both the old temperance commitment to prohibition, which criminalized the entire liquor industry, and to newer approaches that look beyond the small group diagnosable as alcoholics to focus on the much larger group of heavy drinkers who develop serious physical, emotional, and social problems.” (15)
There are many other criticisms of the disease concept, however we will not go in to them at this time. Instead we will review some of the evidence to support the disease concept.
Arguments Endorsing the Disease Concept
Since the introduction of the disease concept research studies have examined a possible genetic link in alcoholism/addiction. One such study demonstrates that the offspring of alcoholics are approximately three to five times more likely to develop alcoholism than offspring of non-alcoholics (18). However, the genetic influence on other drug addiction has received less research attention. Also, in 1983, there was a popular theory of alcohol addiction expressed by D.L. Ohlms in his book “The Disease Concept of Alcoholism”(17) that proposed that alcoholics produced a highly addictive substance called THIQ during the metabolism of alcohol.
THIQ is normally produced when the body metabolizes heroin and is supposedly not metabolized by non-alcoholics when they drink. According to Ohlms, animal studies have shown that a small amount of THIQ injected into the brains of rats will produce alcoholic rats and that THIQ remains in the brain long after an animal has been injected. Therefore, the theory is that alcoholics are genetically predisposed to produce THIQ in response to alcohol, that the THIQ creates a craving for alcohol, and that the THIQ remains in the brain of the alcoholic long after the use of alcohol is discontinued. This would provide a physiological explanation for the fact that recovering alcoholics who relapse quickly return to their previous use patterns. More recent research on genetic causes of alcoholism has focused on some abnormality in a dopamine receptor gene and deficiencies in the neurotransmitter serotonin or in serotonin receptors (19).
As you can see from the above information there is still room for debate and I assure you that the controversy continues.
The Brain’s Response to
Methamphetamine
Speed, meth, chalk, crystal, ice, glass. These are all names for the drug methamphetamine. Methamphetamine comes in many different forms and is snorted, swallowed, injected, or smoked. The smokable form is known as “ice” or “crystal,” due to its appearance.
Methamphetamine is a powerful drug. It acts by changing how the brain works. It also speeds up many functions in the body. Methamphetamine has a chemical structure that is similar to another drug called amphetamine. Methamphetamine can cause lots of harmful things, including inability to sleep, paranoia, aggressiveness, and hallucinations.
Your brain is made up of billions of nerve cells (or neurons). Neurons come in all shapes and sizes, but most have three important parts: a cell body that contains the nucleus and directs the activities of the neuron; dendrites, short fibers that receive messages from other neurons and relay them to the cell body; and an axon, a long single fiber that carries messages from the cell body to dendrites of other neurons.
Axons of one neuron and the dendrites of a neighboring neuron are located very close to each other, but they don’t actually touch. Therefore, to communicate with each other they use chemical messengers known as neurotransmitters. When one neuron wants to send a message to another neuron it releases a neurotransmitter from its axon into the small space that separates the two neurons. This space is called a synapse. The neurotransmitter crosses the synapse and attaches to specific places on the dendrites of the neighboring neuron called receptors. Once the neurotransmitter has relayed its message, it is either destroyed or taken back up into the first neuron where it is recycled for use again.
There are many different neurotransmitters, but the one that is most affected by methamphetamine is dopamine. Dopamine is sometimes called the pleasure neurotransmitter because it helps you feel good from things like playing soccer, eating a big piece of chocolate cake, or riding a roller coaster. When something pleasurable happens, certain axons release lots of dopamine. The dopamine attaches to receptors on dendrites of neighboring neurons and passes on the pleasure message. This process is stopped when dopamine is released from the receptors and pumped back into the neuron that released it where it is stored for later use.
Usually neurons recycle dopamine. But methamphetamine is able to fool neurons into taking it up just like they would dopamine. Once inside a neuron, methamphetamine causes that neuron to release lots of dopamine. All this dopamine causes the person to feel an extra sense of pleasure that can last all day. But eventually these pleasurable effects stop. They are followed by unpleasant feelings called a “crash” that often lead a person to use more of the drug. If a person continues to use methamphetamine, they will have a difficult time feeling pleasure from anything. Imagine no longer enjoying your favorite food or an afternoon with your friends.
Because it is similar to dopamine, methamphetamine can change the function of any neuron that contains dopamine. And if this weren’t enough, methamphetamine can also affect neurons that contain two other neurotransmitters called serotonin and norepinephrine. All of this means that methamphetamine can change how lots of things in the brain and the body work. Even small amounts of methamphetamine can cause a person to be more awake and active, lose their appetite, and become irritable and aggressive. Methamphetamine also causes a person’s blood pressure to increase and their heart to beat faster.
Heavy alcohol use, or binge drinking, among college students in the United States is tied to conditions in the college environment. That is one of the key findings from research conducted by researchers with the Harvard School of Public Health College Alcohol Study (CAS), a landmark study that surveyed more than 50,000 students at 120 colleges from 1993 to 2001. In a new review that examines the findings from the CAS and their implications, the researchers conclude that heavy drinking behavior of students was more common in college environments that have a strong drinking culture, few alcohol control policies on campus or in the surrounding community, weak enforcement of existing policies, and alcohol made easily accessible through low prices, heavy marketing and special promotions. The review appears in the July 2008 issue of the Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs.
The review was conducted by CAS Director Henry Wechsler, lecturer on society, human development and health at Harvard School of Public Health and Assistant Director Toben Nelson, assistant professor of epidemiology and community health at the University of Minnesota.
During its 14-year existence, the CAS focused attention on widespread binge drinking at American colleges and the ensuing serious health and social consequences to drinkers, fellow students and neighbors. “Our study drew attention to the heavy drinking of students, most of whom were not considered alcoholics or in need of traditional treatment, but nevertheless experienced problems as a result of their drinking,” said Wechsler. Students who binge drink–defined by the CAS as five or more drinks in a row for males, and four or more drinks for females, on a single occasion in the past two weeks–are more likely to experience a wide range of problems, including academic difficulties, social conflict, risky sexual behavior, risky driving behavior, vandalism, injury and alcohol overdose. Binge drinkers were also more likely to engage in other risk behaviors such as tobacco and illicit drug use. Students who binge drink frequently were most likely to experience these problems.
In addition to the harms drinkers cause for themselves, CAS research drew attention to the problems that drinkers cause for others on and around campus. The “secondhand” effects of alcohol use, similar to the concept of secondhand smoke, helped people understand that student drinking is harmful to the larger campus community. These problems include drinking-related behavior that is disruptive to studying and sleep, vandalism, and physical and sexual assaults.
“The five/four drink binge measure is a good indicator of who will experience alcohol-related problems, and more importantly, captures most students who actually experience problems, something measures with higher drink thresholds fail to do,” said Wechsler. Binge drinkers account for the vast majority of unintentional injuries, vandalism and disorderly behavior on campus due to alcohol, the researchers found.
CAS research focused on the contribution of the college environment to student drinking behavior. “Binge drinking among college students varies widely from college to college,” said Nelson. “At some colleges almost no students binge drink, while at others nearly four in every five students do. Interestingly, we found that the levels of binge drinking, and the problems related to it, remain very stable at the same colleges over time.” This finding occurred despite surveying a new group of students in each of the CAS surveys. “That suggests there is something about certain college environments that promote binge drinking,” added Nelson.
While some students chose to enroll in a college because it has a party reputation, CAS research found that campuses that emphasize intercollegiate athletics and fraternity and sorority life have higher levels of binge drinking. Students who lived off-campus with friends or in other unsupervised settings were also more likely to binge drink.
On the other hand, colleges that restricted use by banning alcohol on campus or offering substance-free housing options had fewer drinkers, and as a result lower binge drinking levels. State and local government can also play a role. Students who attended colleges in states with stronger alcohol control policies were less likely to be binge drinkers.
The ease with which students can access alcohol is another important factor. “A ‘wet’ college environment, one that has many stores where students can buy alcohol, and may be influenced to do so by heavy marketing, low prices and special promotions, creates the conditions for heavy drinking,” said Wechsler. “If colleges can change those conditions, they can reduce binge drinking among their students.”
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Article adapted by Medical News Today from original press release.
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“What We Have Learned From the Harvard School of Public Health College Alcohol Study: Focusing Attention on College Student Alcohol Consumption and the Environmental Conditions That Promote It,” Henry Wechsler, Toben F. Nelson, Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs, 69(4):481-490, 2008.
The Harvard School of Public Health College Alcohol Study was funded by grants from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.
Harvard School of Public Health (http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/) is dedicated to advancing the public’s health through learning, discovery, and communication. More than 400 faculty members are engaged in teaching and training the 1,000-plus student body in a broad spectrum of disciplines crucial to the health and well being of individuals and populations around the world. Programs and projects range from the molecular biology of AIDS vaccines to the epidemiology of cancer; from risk analysis to violence prevention; from maternal and children’s health to quality of care measurement; from health care management to international health and human rights. For more information on the school visit: http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/edu
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Source: Todd Datz
Harvard School of Public Health
Sunday, June 22, 2008 5:44 PM EDT
The Associated Press
By PAUL J. WEBER Associated Press Writer
MINEOLA, Texas (AP) — In the windowless front rooms of a former day care center in a tiny Texas community, children as young as 5 were fed powerful painkillers they knew as “silly pills” and forced to perform sex shows for a crowd of adults.
Two people have already been convicted in the case. Now a third person with ties to the club, previously known in town only as a swingers group, is set to go on trial Monday not far from Mineola, population 5,100.
“This really shook this town,” said Shirley Chadwick, a longtime resident of Mineola. “This was horrible.”
Patrick Kelly, 41, is charged with aggravated sexual assault of a child, tampering with physical evidence and engaging in organized criminal activity.
In all, six adults have been charged in connection with the case, including a parent of the three siblings involved.
Jurors this year deliberated less than five minutes before returning guilty verdicts against the first two defendants, who were accused of grooming the kids for sex shows in “kindergarten” classes and passing off Vicodin as “silly pills” to help the children perform.
Jamie Pittman and Shauntel Mayo were sentenced to life in prison. Kelly also faces a life sentence if convicted, and Smith County prosecutors hope for another swift verdict.
Thad Davidson, Kelly’s attorney, said his client passed a lie-detector test proving his innocence and worries about getting a fair trial in Tyler, 25 miles southeast of Mineola, which is in Wood County.
“I think it’s impossible to get a fair trial within 80 miles of Smith County,” Davidson said.
Mineola, about 80 miles east of Dallas, is a close-knit, conservative bean-processing town of with more than 30 churches. Residents there want to put the scandal behind them as quickly as possible.
The one-story building where prosecutors say four children — the three siblings, now ages 12, 10 and 7, and their 10-year-old aunt — were trained to perform in front of an audience of 50 to 100 once a week has been vacant since the landlord ousted the alleged organizers in 2004.
Down a slight hill is a retirement home, and even closer is the office of the local newspaper. Doris Newman, editor of The Mineola Monitor, said rumors of swinger parties spread around town but that no one mentioned children being involved.
Newman, who can see the building from her office window, said she remembers the parking lot filling up with more than a dozen cars at night.
In August 2004, an editorial under the headline “Sex In the City” opined that if the swingers left quietly, “we’ll try and forget they’ve infiltrated our town with their set of moral standards.”
“It’s not that we’re trying to look the other way,” Newman said. “But there’s a lot more to Mineola than that.”
According to a Mineola police report, the department first investigated a complaint in June 2005 in which the siblings’ foster mother said one of the girls described dancing toward men and another child saying that “everybody does nasty stuff in there.”
In the second trial, Child Protective Services caseworker Kristi Hachtel testified, “I’ve seen a lot and I never in my wildest dreams imagined this. They were preyed upon in probably one of the most heinous ways possible.”
The children are now doing better, the welfare agency said.
“Through counseling and therapy sessions, these children are now finally feeling secure and safe,” agency spokeswoman Shari Pulliam wrote in an e-mail.
Permanent custody of the three siblings was given to John and Margie Cantrell. This week, prosecutors in California charged John Cantrell with sexually assaulting a child in the state 18 years ago. Margie Cantrell said her husband is innocent.
Kelly’s attorney moved Friday asking to postpone the trial in light of the allegations against Cantrell, a state witness. Texas Child Protective Services said it would be “common” for the agency to investigate.
The Rev. Tim Letsch is opening a church in the yellow-plastered building where the children were abused. He acknowledges that building a congregation might be difficult because of the stigma attached to the property.
“You got to decide whether you’re willing to forgive those kind of things,” Letsch said. “It’s a hard deal. Especially for a spiritual person to walk in and say, ‘This happened here.’”
In Recovery
